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Part 1

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Let me start by saying that in all honesty, there are probably 5,498 reasons why I love TV.

Anyhoosier...in this installment of why I love TV, I want to talk about one particular thing. Both my parents died over ten years ago, within a few months of each other. In the past ten years I've had many 'milestone' moments, and I often wonder how my parents would react to them. High school graduation...going off to college...becoming a Christian...these were all 'big' moments in my life that they missed out on. Now, obviously if they were still alive, my life would be different in a bajillion ways. Many of the 'big' moments in my life might have never occurred, and even if they still did, they would probably be significantly different than the way they actual turned out. For example, I would say that 90% of the events surrounding my becoming a Christian were directed related to the fact that both my parents were dead. Even so, when I tend to wonder how my parents would react to ________, I generally try to imagine that everything else in my life is the same, it's just that they're still alive.

The truth is, I'll never know how my parents would have reacted to the numerous 'big moments' that I've had in my life since they bought the farm (sometimes you have to joke about things so you don't spend hours sobbing about it...I'm just sayin'...is all...). Okay, so how is TV related to any of this? Well, I might never know for sure how my parents would react to ________, but by watching shows where characters experience _________, I can watch how their parents react, and sort of live vicariously through that.

Let me give you a recent example from "Grey's Anatomy" (yes, I realise that some of you are probably uber-tired of me talking about this show all the time...fear not...'Glee' returns this week, so I'll have another show to obsess about...and if you're not a fan of 'Glee' either...keep in mind that I'm an orphan. I have no shame...I'll milk the orphan thing if it means that you'll read my random ramblings about TV shows that you hate...I'm just sayin'...is all...).

A few weeks ago there was the You can't pray away the gay!! episode. I posted about it twice, I think. So you're probably already seen all the Callie & Arizona scenes from that episode. Anyway, in the year and a half-ish that I've realised "Holy cow...I'm still gay! Like, I'm REALLY gay! Oh crapola!!" I've often wondered how my parents would react to the news. It's kinda weird, but I tend to think that my mom would be okay with it...eventually. It's one of those things that I think would pretty much shock her at first, but over time, I think that she would accept it and be okay with it. I think that for her the biggest issue would be with reconcilling it with the Bible. Truth is, I'm at a point now where I honestly do not see the two as being incompatible at all. I believe that I would be able to effectively explain WHY I can be gay and a Christian, and that she would accept it. My father is a little bit trickier though. Keep in mind he was born in 1925. He's old school. He was in the United States Marine Corps (tangent: happy birthday to all my Marine readers!!) during World War II, and from what little information I have, I believe that he saw some very 'unpleasant' (to put it nicely) things in the Pacific.

My father's been dead over ten years, yet I still fear that if he were alive he'd never approve of me being gay...and that bothers me...a lot. A lot more than it should really. Now, it doesn't keep me up at night or anything, but it's something that I often think about. In approximately 18 months I will inherent my father's estate, and I've been wondering a lot lately how he might have written his will differently had he known I was gay. Honestly, I'm not even 100% sure where all these thoughts have been coming from, but it's definitely something that's been on my mind much more often these past few months.

So in a nutshell, here I am seriously wondering how my father would react to me being gay. I have no way of knowing. I can't ask him. Even though I know that I'll never know for sure, it still bothers me. I still want to know. And that's where "Grey's Anatomy" comes into the picture (I bet that you were hoping that I had forgotten about Grey's...don't lie...I know that it's true...just remember, you're reading the words of an ORPHAN...I'm just sayin'...is all...).

In the You can't pray away the gay!! episode, Arizona talks with Callie's dad. This is after he's brought Father Kevin with him to see Callie and try to 'de-gayify' her. Callie and her dad basically have a screaming match with different verses from the Bible. It's not pretty. Things are not looking good...at all. Then Arizona sees Callie's dad, and decides to go talk to him...to share with him a little bit about herself, and specifically how HER father reacted when she came out.

(the 'important part' starts at 5:35 of the video...though if you have the time, and haven't seen it yet, you should just watch the whole thing...hey now...no rolling your eyes like that at the ORPHAN...I'm just sayin'...is all...)


Huh...turns out that Arizona's dad is a Marine. And from her description is sounds pretty 'old school'...and while he didn't serve in WWII, her grandfather did...and in the Pacific at that. Interesting...

Look, this is just a TV show, I get that. It's not real life...I know. This is a scene that a bunch of writers stuck in a room together came up with. They were looking to make good TV...they weren't necessarily looking to make the most realistic portrayal of how a Marine would react to his daughter being a lesbian.

It's not real. It's TV. I know. Yet...yet it still really touched me. It still made me feel better. It still gave me that glimmer of hope that if my father were still alive, that he could accept me. It still gave me that glimmer of hope that ultimately, as long as he knew that I was still the daughter that he raised, that everything would be okay.

You see, the thing is, the values that this fictional character's father raised her to have...those are the same values that my father raised me to have. Much of what Arizona said I could have said myself. And in the end, her father didn't hate her. Her father didn't kick her out of the house. Her father didn't disown her. Fictional character or not...that scene...that scene gives me hope. Ahem, HOPE. And we could all use a little more hope in our lives, couldn't we?

So yes, a scene in a TV show...a scene with fictional characters...that gives me hope. That lets me sleep a little better at night, knowing that Arizona's dad could have been my dad. Just the possibility that my father would be proud of me if he were still alive...just the POSSIBILITY of that...that's a beautiful thing...that's a reassuring and comforting thing.

Even if you abhor "Grey's Anatomy" and can't stand when I mention the show in my posts...you've got to admit...a show that reassures and comforts an ORPHAN (I'm milking this baby for all it's worth today)...that's a pretty good thing, no?

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I've been listening to a lot of new music lately, and I wanted to blog about that...and I like aliteration, hence "Music Monday"...but it's Sunday...though actually, in some parts of the world it IS Monday now. So maybe I should have called this post "Music Monday (in Australia at least)"? Hmmm...

Anyhoosier...let's get to the music

As I've recently become obsessed with "Grey's Anatomy" I also recently realised that it's a show that utilises amazing music. So a lot of the new music that I've been listening too lately has come from the show...for example, "Little Pieces" by Gomez.


I've found a few other songs by the band, but to be honest, they're more of a 'one hit wonder' for me. All the other songs of theirs that I've heard don't even come CLOSE to "Little Pieces".

I feel like such a bad lesbian, as it was only a few weeks (maybe a month) ago that I first heard of Brandi Carlile. Please forgive me Hopefully I won't lose my lesbian card over this. So far I've found two songs of hers that I really enjoy. One is "The Story"...


And the other is "Before it Breaks"...


Cool songs, right?

I've also been listening to some stuff that's NOT "Grey's Anatomy" related (at least not that I know of)...OneRepublic is one of those bands. While I've really enjoyed the one studio album of theirs that I have, I have to admit...all the videos that I've seen of them live are HORRID. The lead singer sounds EXTREMELY different live...and I don't like it...at all. If I had heard them live first, there's no way that I would have EVER bought one of their albums.

Snow Patrol is one of those bands that I've known about for forever and ten years. I never got 'too' into them, but they've had a few songs over the years that I've REALLY enjoyed. And thanks to my new found "Grey's Anatomy" obsession I've found a 'new to me' song of theirs that I absolutely love


So what music are you listening to right now? What upcoming album releases are you super-duper excited about?

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The Bible. Duh. It's about a bajillion pages long...which means that it's got plenty of room to have 5,498 'inspiring moments' in it. In particular, I find the books of Ruth and Esther to be extremely inspiring.

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